Spank The Glaucoma Monkey

Angry Gorilla

This post refers back to my post made almost a year ago: Spank The Monkey

In that post, Yummy Baby has since evolved into Wifey, while Funky Lady has evolved into the Liverpool Babe.

Yesterday, after seeing the kids, Wifey and I went to her cousin’s office as we were contracted by the company he is working for to do a branding proposal for them. We finished late, and since Wifey’s kids are with her ex (a.k.a Glaucoma Monkey) for the weekend, she called him up to tell him to send them back on time as they have to go to school today. He had the cheek to ask Wifey where she was, and upon Wifey’s reply that she was at her cousin’s office, he retorted,

“Azrin’s office or SeaDemon’s office?”

Wifey being Wifey, the victim of domestic violence when she was married to the monkey, went on to give an explanation on what she was doing at Azrin’s office, much to my chagrin. I can’t blame her for that – I’m pretty sure she still bears mental scars because of it, but she is no longer married to the bastard, therefore she was not obliged to say anything.

Just last week, he made me drive all the way to his place to pick up Wifey’s kids, but never picked up his phone so that he’d know I was already waiting outside his apartment building. In the end, I left fuming – because that was NOT the first time he had done so.

Evolution - Salagram dot Net

Despite this year being the 200th year of Darwin’s Theory of Evolution, some primate apparently has yet to be able to evolve, even into a Homo Sexual. My guess is, his inability to attain a Homo Erectus has stunted his evolving into a Homo Sapien. I am not sure if he has any brain, let alone the brain capacity to think, or remember last April’s incident. So, I decided to take matters into my own hands, and sent him this SMS:

“Whatever arrangement you had with her (Wifey) has ended. From now on things go by my rules. You want to see your kids, you fetch them, you send them back. Neither my wife, definitely not I, are your drivers. If you don’t have a car, call for a cab. You have no right over her because that ended two Septembers ago. Therefore, questions like “Are you at Azrin’s office or at SeaDemon’s office?” should no longer arise and would from now on be totally uncalled for. I expect you as a father to feed, clothe and school your children. You cannot expect me to do that for you. By the way, you still owe me money for the kids’ school fees, pocket money, and their clinic fees. So make monthly provision to pay me back because you are their father. I hope we are clear on these points so I do not have to repeat myself in the future.”

Of course the ball-less monkey wouldn’t have any balls to reply to my SMS.

But I’ll be watching…because if he breathes wrongly, I’ll be more than glad to whack him senselessly into place again, just as a second reminder