Your Opinion Does Not Matter
Damn it!
I slept well last night albeit a 6-hour sleep. I got up, put on the sphygomomanometer (did I get the spelling correct?), cuffed the right arm, pumped air until it reached 220mm Hg and released.
Guess what the reading was?
147/97 and pulse was 82
And do you know what’s ironic?
Lite FM was playing Bee Gees’ “Tragedy”
Sick!
“Anggota Mertak Tentera Brunei sedang mengaplikasikan konsep TFK kepada senjata mortar”
Dalam usaha memperkasakan lagi Tentera Darat, satu silibus baru akan diperkenalkan kepada para pegawai dan anggota Tentera Darat.
Silibus tersebut yang diberi nama Total Forces Knowledge atau singkatannya TFK akan diperkenalkan secepat mungkin untuk menggantikan modul peperangan konvensyenal atau CW.
Menurut Panglima Briged Organisasi – Latihan Angkatan Medan – Pengkhususan Asas(BO LAM PA), satu modul khusus akan diperkenalkan kepada para pegawai mengenai pengunaan komputer dalam peperangan siber. Modul tersebut yang akan diletakkan sebagai salah satu modul Diploma TFK dikenali sebagai Powerful Computer Command atau PCC, dan para pegawai dibenarkan menggunakan singkatan Dip. in TFK/PCC.
Beberapa orang pegawai kanan akan menjalani latihan penyesuaian dengan Angkatan Darat Korea Selatan di Korean National Nano-Computer Command Bureau (KNNCCB) yang terletak 48 kilometer ke selatan Incheon.
Pada tahun hadapan, satu latihan bersama dengan pasukan sahabat dari luar negara akan diadakan untuk menguji keberkesanan TFK/PCC. Latihan tersebut yang akan disertai bersama oleh tentera darat dari Jepun, India, Australia, Oman, Brunei dan Indonesia akan dikenali sebagai Latihan Asas Negara Jepun India Australia Oman Brunei Indonesia atau lebih dikenali dengan singkatannya LAN JIAO BIN.
Pasukan Merah yang akan bertindak sebagai musuh akan dianggotai oleh sebuah pasukan bersama yang dikenali sebagai Commando Hierarchy External Enemy – Pasukan Eksternal Komando atau CHEE PEK. Pasukan pertahanan atau Pasukan Biru dikenali sebagai Anti Pasukan Eksternal Komando atau APEK dan akan dibantu oleh sebuah bateri pasukan artileri yang akan memintas kedudukan musuh, dikenali sebagai Command International Battery Artillery Integrated (CIBAI). Manakala sebuah pasukan perubatan ketenteraan dari Korea Selatan akan ditempatkan di kawasan latihan. Pasukan ini dikenali sebagai Army Hospital – Korean Unit Assistance atau AH KUA.
Menurut Panglima BO LAM PA, latihan ini adalah untuk menunjukkan dengan latihan TFK/PCC yang berkesan, peperangan boleh dimenangi hanya dengan menggunakan tangan tanpa senjata khusus.
So what kind of a woman have you married?
If she gives you the respect, trust, love and smile, then she is a good wife. Protect and lover her. But if she backstabs you, treats you like one of the pillars inside your house, bad mouths you to your family and also your friends (not just hers, okay?), then you better give her the boot.
Why am I writing this, you may ask?
A business friend of mine sent me a message saying he is bored this weekend and would like to chill, and reading my blog is not his idea of chilling for the weekend. Prior to having his number given to my wife, he didn’t even know the existence of my blog and it has been up for two years now. So it goes to show that not only does she bad-mouth me to my family (and until now she hasn’t confessed that she showed my blog to my parents and siblings), but also to MY friends. So this is very much like throwing sand into my rice bowl.
When is she going to realise that every single contraindicative action is only making me like the Moon is to Earth now? Only that the moon is moving away from us at a rate of 3.8cm per year.
My rate of escaping gravitational orbit is a lot faster than that. What more with catalysts.
I have been upset. It has not been a good month for me. There isn’t a moment that I have not thought about death and how to go about achieving it. Only two things stop me. My kids, and my thoughts of her. No matter how close to impossible it seems as she puts it. Everytime I sit behind the wheel of my car, especially that Saga, I reason with myself that I should make it back home alive.
Today is no different. After being back-stabbed by trusted ones like Caesar was a millenium ago, I received news about Choy a.k.a Metalized‘s current health condition. He is suffering from cerebral aneurysm, which can be life threatening. You can read about it in his latest blog posting.
Damn this. I have had the worst birthday, the worst month in terms of emotional rollercoaster ride, shunned by my whole family because of my pursuit of happiness despite someone’s uncertainty, and now, a good friend whom I have grown fond of, is facing a real uncertainty in life.
How can life be so f***ed up? How much worse can it get? Is there anymore? Anything more that is worse than this? Give it to me. Why can’t I die instead? Everyone says I am a bad person, so take me, and end the miseries of others. My wife says she is rich, so let her take care of the kids. After all, my journey forward after having gone through the steps is still filled with uncertainties…so take me. Why take Choy who is just at the peak of his life? At least I only have someone I can look at but still don’t know if I can hold her for good.
I’m swimming all alone in a pool of darkness
and I feel like darkness is slowly pulling me under
I yell for help but no one is there to hear it
I begin to see the water at eye level
and I kick and flail
fighting to stay above the darkness
But the darkness won’t let go of its hold on me
and I slowly begin to give in
to the feeling that lies below the water line
the waters starts to fill my lungs
the lungs that once held so much life
yet now they allow the murky water to replace that
I know that this path doesn’t lead to happiness
But why doesn’t someone grab my hand
pull me from darkness’s grasp?
because no one knows I stand at the boundary
the boundary between light and dark
so I give in to the thing that holds me
All of the strength and all of the courage
that I once held in my heart
can’t save me from the water
So I slowly slip below the world of conscientiousness
undetected by the occupants of that world
I don’t want to fight anymore
I’ve given into darkness
This mortal coil…will end in tears.
You find someone who makes you happy…who is almost impossible, but not entirely impossible, to have.
To have this person you risk upsetting lots of people.
In pursuit of your happiness, would you go ahead?
Imagine being stabbed in the back by the ones closest to you.
Imagine betrayal.
This is f***ing hillarious. This is what Countloon tried to order yesterday but got upset when the waiter told him the pork curry was already finished.
Picture taken by Fazira using my camera-phone
I think I was at my lowest point when I quarreled with my father via SMS the previous evening. I had everything..headache, neckache and chest pain. So I walked down and saw Nisaa sitting next to Fazira who was eating sausages. So I asked Nisaa if I could put my head on her lap. She never said anything. My head must have been really heavy on her tiny lap but she did not budge. Then I heard her ask, “Ayah sakit ke?”, to which I replied, “Uhuh!”, half asleep.
Then without being told, she massaged my head.
Over lunch, I told my eldest daughter Hana, about what happened yesterday.
She just hugged me and cried.
SeaDemon Says 
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