Someone sent me an e-mail and asked for my forgiveness. I told that person that all is forgiven. She wanted to leave me so I let her leave. She is now happy, things are good for her now, and I am very happy for her. I told her not to think about it so much but just remember that she had made me happy once. It is only fair that she is now happier, and that makes me happy too. She will be spending this Hari Raya happily at her in-laws’ place somewhere up North.
So Hari Raya is in two days time.
I will only see all my children tomorrow night, on the eve of Hari Raya. I will not be celebrating Hari Raya with them. On the first day, I am going to go to the mosque, then come back home and sleep, wake up around lunchtime, and go to Forelorn Soldier‘s house and also maybe to Bakawali‘s. Feed myself with as much cholesterol, fat, uric acid, sodium. See what that does to my BP as I have been off medication since sahur this morning.
As it is right now, I can feel neckache, stiffness of the shoulders and my scalp feels warm. Two months of betablockers and ACEs have not done much for me. Taking more will only give me toxicity and organ failures. So it’s better for me to die of one cause only and not as a direct result of what was supposed to help me.
Then come the night of the first Hari Raya I will be going diving. I will pack clothes for a week and just rotate if I plan to stay longer. Extended stay during the monsoon would be good. Incommunicado.
After all, I only celebrate Ramadhan. Hari Raya is only for kids and suicide drivers.
SeaDemon Says 