Month: January 2008

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Today I Decide – Part 2

MMEA patrol craft by OuledKenitra

It’s the Malaysian Maritime Enforcement Agency. I hope to either get a post at the HQ, or in Tawau or Sandakan where piracy and smuggling activities are still rampant. Go where the action is. After all, I have 13 good years left, and I can only live this life once. I can make good of all the training I have received during my Air Force days.

It would be a good thing for me to be away, too.

Maybe I would grow to like the place, and follow the footsteps of some of my predecessors in the military who have settled down there and never to come back.

All I’ll be needing would be my dive equipments.

Now, let’s wait for the reply.

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Today I Decide

Today is the deadline for me to decide where I go. The final letter is ready for delivery. It is up to the higher authorities to place me where they want me to be at.

Malaysian Maritime Enforcement AgencyAir AsiaMalaysia AirlinesPegawai Tadbir dan Diplomatik

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Lust, Caution, Boring

“Sayang, do you want to watch a DVD? There’s nothing on telly right now,” she asked me, holding up an original imitation DVD of the 2007 movie, Lust, Caution.

“Is it any good?” I asked, coughing. This damned flu is not making things any better. Still embroiled in this argument on DIR vs non-DIR diving.

“Tony Leung’s in it, as well as that nice chick, Tang Wei,” she said. “My friends have seen it and they said there are juicy parts where we can see full frontal.”

“Hmm, nice. Full frontal of who?” I asked.

“Tony Leung lor!” she exclaimed. “And the juicy scenes according to them, have been done very artistically.”

“Dang! I thought it was full-frontal of Tang Wei,” I sighed. “Would have made my day better. Put it on, Honey. What language is it in?”

“Mandarin,” she replied, pausing what she was doing and looking at me. “Well, we are supposed to be Mandarin speakers, right?”

Ten minutes into the movie, both of us were struggling to understand what was being said in the movie.

“Hmm. Imagine if people were to see our facial expressions right now. One chinese, one malay, trying to comprehend what’s been said in Mandarin. Not good.” I pulled her closer to me. “Can you put on the subtitles, Honey?”

She fiddled with the remote. Then the subtitles came on. It was in Malay. But it was in direct translation into Malay.

“Holy cow! Even I cannot understand the Malay subtitles,” I remarked.

“Should we just skip all the boring scenes and go to the juicy parts?” she asked, smiling at me.

We skipped from one juicy part to another. Tang Wei looked great with and without clothes. Although the sex acts were okay, there was no total frontal shot as she expected. In the end, we summarised the movie into something about a girl who was asked to kill a chinese who works for the Japanese invaders of China during WW2, screwed him to gain his trust, then betrayed her compatriots because she loved him. In the end, even she was executed.

Lame.

“Honey,” I called out softly. “You know I have this flu, right? And you wouldn’t give me wine to warm myself up.”

“What do you have in mind, Sayang?” she asked.

“How about we see each other’s full frontal instead?” I asked with an innocent face. “I am no Tony Leung, but I can assure you the juicy scenes would be even juicier.”

She kissed me and giggled, and we turned off all the lights and made our way to the bedroom.

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How Exciting Has Your Life Been So Far?

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. ”

Mark Twain

I can sail, I can fly a plane, I have an ‘E’ drivers license, I can skydive, I can BASE-jump, I can do recreational diving, I can do technical diving, I have been to the North Pole, I have performed my Haj, I rode on a jet-ski 1,000 kilometers non-stop, I’ve fired guns of all sorts, throw grenades, fire anti-tank weapons, fire anti-aircraft missile…and I still have two more things I would like to achieve before I die.

How has your life been like so far?

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Moving On With Life

I have not been well the past few days. I lost my nose because it ran away. It was very runny. Thanks to a very good friend of mine who brought me some Zyrtec-D, coupled with the Amoxycillin dose, things are somewhat under control. Well, I do sneeze still, though not as much as before.

I managed to speak to the a friend who had just returned from Krungthep today (after our meet last weekend – he was there to work, I was there working out) and talked about the recent trip as well as our previous ones together. The heavy rain outside made the atmosphere more melancholic, and one song was playing on my mind – a song that I have posted earlier this month.

Here is the song again, and the translation to its lyrics:

Since the day you left me and went away life has no meaning to me
I looked like a dead person when you walked away with him
I am getting much better now and have almost forgotten I was once hurt
Time has helped me forget whatever that had happened between us

But one day I saw you by his side
I felt the pain again as before

From today, I will have to start all over again
So I can forget whatever that remains in my heart
Whenever I see you with him

From today, I will have to bear the pain and loneliness
It’s like walking down memory lane
My heart is upset, you were once mine, and I haven’t forgotten that

I don’t blame you, I don’t blame anyone else
I have only myself to blame
For I can’t forget though I’ve suffered for a long time
I keep lying to myself
That time will help me forget, but how long will it take?
If ten months weren’t enough, how about ten years then
so I can truly forget you

I just found that out when I saw you by his side
I felt the pain again as before

From today, I will have to start all over again
So I can forget whatever that remains in my heart
Whenever I see you with him

From today, I will have to bear the pain and loneliness
It’s like walking down memory lane
My heart is upset, you were once mine, and I haven’t forgotten that

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What Men Think What Women Say But What Women Actually Mean

Nine words women use…

1. Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2. Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3. Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4. Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. DON’T FUCKING DO IT!

5. Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6. That’s Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you’re welcome.

8. Whatever : Is a women’s way of saying FUCK YOU!

9. Don’t worry about it, I got it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3.Then you RUN!

*thanks AccordBuruk* 😀

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Cheap Set Of Fu**ing – Or Is It?

There I was with her after dinner walking along the infamous soi Cowboy just for fun when a bargirl grabbed me by the hand with this big smile, obviously ignoring my companion, saying, “Come, sir. F*cking set, cheap, cheap!”

I raised an eyebrow to my companion and said to her in English, “Let me find out what this is all about.”

So I turned to this girl who was dressed in tank top, covering her seemingly flat braless breasts with perky nipples that seemed to want to puncture the top, and the shortest of short skirt. “How much for a cheap f*cking set?” I asked.

“You wan f*cking set all in only fai hundled naity nai Baht,” she replied mustering the sweetest smile.

“How long?” I asked.

“How long you wan all nait same same fai hundled naity nai Baht,” she replied.

Baht 599 for a f*cking set? That’s way too cheap. There has to be a catch somewhere.

“Can I bring my girlfriend in with me?” I asked, refering to her.

“Yes, can, come I show you you pay for f*cking set,” she said leading the way into the bar.

I grabbed her by the hand, she was reluctant at first, but followed me in.

There stood the sweet young thing, giving me the sweetest smile, her left hand pointing to this:

Fucking set for Baht 599

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I Would Rather Do It My Way Than To Do It Right

Do It Right.

A phraseword that has become the code of conduct for divers of the Global Underwater Explorers (GUE): a group, and now a diving agency, born from the need to streamline and standardize equipments for underwater cave exploration, promoting the Do It Right (DIR) way of doing things. They swear by the standards that GUE is promoting that they look at divers who are not DIR as DIW (Do It Wrong).

There is a hot topic on that on the forum now. I have been involved in technical diving since the third quarter of 2005. I find that DIR requires lots of redundancies and skills that are overkills, and would only suit a certain kind of diving – cave exploration or deep wreck penetration, for example.

ALL dive agencies have good standards for teaching and promoting dive safety. It is how the instructors convey the lessons, and the students’ comprehension that makes the difference. A good diver is determined by his/her dive experiences. A diver who dives in Sipadan 1,000 times in good visibility is no better than a diver who has 50 dives but dives in very low visibility conditions like in Port Dickson or Pulau Sembilan on a bad day. Equipment brand does not make one a good diver either: there are lots of divers in Sabah who dive using home-made equipment and can dive far better than a Course Director even.

So for you new divers, or those who plan to take up diving soon, do not be conned into being trained by certain agencies, or conned into believing that an ex-commando dive instructor would make the best instructor (commandos are BAD divers – trust me!), or conned by your instructor into buying equipment the moment you complete your open water course: DON’T!

You get more dives, and ask to borrow different equipments from friends…see what you like, try them out – then only you decide. Don’t waste thousands of Ringgit and at the end, you don’t quite like what you’ve bought.

I Do It My Way!