Category: What da f***!!

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What Do You Expect?

What big teeth you have, Grandma!

Sharks Maul Diver

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PORT DOUGLAS, Australia (11 Dec 2005) — A spear fisherman has escaped with a gashed arm after fending off one shark only to be mauled from behind by another in a frenzied attack off Queensland’s far north.

Melbourne charter boat operator Glenn Simpson, 44, is nursing his badly wounded left arm which required dozens of stitches after the attack at a reef off Port Douglas.

Mr Simpson was spear fishing with his 15-year-old son Luke when the attack happened early Sunday.

“I had one come straight in my face – I punched him with my left arm to get him out of my face,” Mr Simpson told the Ten Network.

“And as I did that I was thinking I got rid of him and another one came from behind and grabbed my right arm.”

With his boat 60 metres away, Mr Simpson, who was bleeding heavily, told his son to leave him.

But his son refused and instead helped his father back to the boat.

“I ignored him. I stayed with him all the way back to the boat,” Luke told the Cairns Post.

“I’m happy that I stayed with Dad.”

The feeding frenzy began after Luke speared a trout.

“After that they started harassing me and dad a bit,” Luke said.

And then, “just out of nowhere, it was just like shark city,” Mr Simpson told the Ten Network.

“It was like something out of a movie,” he said.

“I consider myself very lucky, you know, especially with the mood the sharks were in.”

The Simpsons have vowed to continue spearfishing but admit they will be more cautious in the water.

A spokeswoman for Cairns Base Hospital said Mr Simpson was in a satisfactory condition.

Another man was killed by a shark a year ago while spear-fishing at a reef close to the area of Sunday’s attack.

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Twenty-Three Cars Stolen Every Day!!

Twenty-Three Cars Stolen Every Day

KUALA LUMPUR, Dec 12 (Bernama) — An average of 23 cars, 141 motorcycles and 13 lorries and vans were stolen every day last year, Inspector-General of Police Tan Sri Mohd Bakri Omar said Monday.

He said 65,076 cases of vehicle theft were reported last year which amounted to a total loss of RM753.2 million.

“The police were able to solve 18,294 of the cases and recovered in terms of value RM192.88 million, which is a success rate of 28.11 per cent,” he said during his keynote address when opening the first National Seminar on Vehicle Theft to discuss effective strategies against vehicle theft, here.

He said the losses incurred by the vehicle owners and insurance companies were enormous and would adversely affect the economy.

Bakri said vehicle theft attempts by individuals or syndicates should be addressed by re-examining existing laws and regulations so that offenders would face stiffer penalties.

In addition to sharing skills and knowledge, enforcement officers also needed to be trained in handling such cases, he said.

He said the police had already set up a task force within the Criminal Investigation Department (CID) to tackle vehicle theft and related offences, including the hijacking of lorries and trucks carrying industrial goods.

The role of the task force, headed by Bukit Aman CID Director Datuk Mohd Fauzi Saari, was to formulate strategies and draw up the most suitable investigation practices by emphasising on intelligence procurement and forensic investigation.

Speakers from the police, Customs and Excise Department, Road Transport Department and the private sector are presenting their working papers at the two-day seminar jointly organised by the Royal Malaysia Police and the General Insurance Association of Malaysia.

— BERNAMA

You dork! Next time steal a vehicle that has keys inside!

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A Poem I Wrote

This is a poem I wrote just a few minutes ago…I really hope something can be done about the cruelty of shark-finning.

A Shark’s PleaHelp! I'm drowning!

From the subclass called Elasmobranchii
Evolved my predecessors, my family and I
In terms of number of years 409 million
I have been here since the Upper Devonian

I have strong teeth, they make big gash
But I have no desire for human flesh
But humans make me into a cause
Thank you to the paranoia caused by ‘Jaws’

They hunt, and fin us, they did not even frown
Then they toss us back to sea alive to drown
To earn millions for them is something of a coup
While it was only our fins that end up in some soup

All their butchering earned them some praise
While we never did anything to the human race
15 human deaths a year is attributed to the snake
0.4 human deaths a year is all we could rake

So please, I beg you, make your kind realise
The decimation of a kind goes not without a price
We both live in the same world, so please make them see
So your children and mine can learn to co-exist and enjoy the sea

Abdul Rahmat Omar a.k.a SeaDemon
8th December 2005

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Global Warming Has Claimed Its First Village

Global warming claims first village

Powered by CDNN – CYBER DIVER News Network
by ALISTER DOYLE
TEGUA ISLAND, Vanuatu (6 Dec 2005) — RISING seas have forced 100 people on a Pacific island to move to higher ground in what may be the first example of a village formally displaced because of modern global warming, a UN report has said.

With coconut palms on the coast already standing in water, inhabitants in the Lateu settlement on Tegua Island in Vanuatu started dismantling their wooden homes in August and moved about 548.64m inland.

“They could no longer live on the coast,” Taito Nakalevu, a climate change expert at the Secretariat of the Pacific Regional Environment Program.

The spokesman was attending a 189-nation conference in Montreal on ways to fight climate change.

King tides, often whipped up by cyclones, had become stronger in recent years and made Lateu uninhabitable by flooding the village four to five times a year.

“We are seeing king tides across the region flooding islands,” he said.

The UN Environment Program (UNEP) said in a statement the Lateu settlement “has become one of, if not the first, to be formally moved out of harm’s way as a result of climate change.”

The scientific panel advised the United Nations seas could rise by almost 0.9m by 2100 because of melting icecaps and warming linked to a build-up of heat trapping gases emitted by burning fossil fuels in power plants, factories and cars.

Many other coastal communities are vulnerable to rising seas, such as the US city of New Orleans, the Italian city of Venice or settlements in the Arctic where a thawing of sea ice has exposed coasts to erosion by the waves.

Pacific Islanders, many living on coral atolls, are among those most at risk.

Off Papua New Guinea, about 2000 people on the Cantaret Islands are planning to move to nearby Bougainville island, four hours’ boat ride to the southwest.

Two uninhabited Kiribati islands, Tebua Tarawa and Abanuea, disappeared underwater in 1999.

“In Tegua, the dwellings are moving first. The chief has moved, he has to start the process, so his people are now following,” Mr Nakalevu said.

A church would also be dismantled and moved inland.

Mr Nakalevu said the rising seas seemed to be linked to climate change.

It was unknown if the coral base of the island, about 31sq km, might be subsiding. Most villagers rely on yams, beans and other crops grown on higher ground.

To help Lateu, Canada provided $US50,000 ($66,649) to build a system to collect and store up to 36,000 litres of rain water to break dependence on springs by the coast.