Imagine the time wasted while you sit on the throne. The above is a new idea on what you can actually do while dumping your crap. But I cannot imagine having to walk from the throne if you want to get the ball back, and you’re having diarrhoea at that time.
I would either have a magazine or a novel with me. If I cannot get those, then I would read the fine label prints of a shampoo bottle or the toothpaste tube. However, thanks to the advent of wireless technology, I am writing this from my bedroom toilet. Imagine the number of fine ideas you get while you dump the crap out of you – marvellous.
My favourite read in the toilet would consist of anything on theology, any underwater activity, military or politics; there was once when I would frequent to the toilet after forcing myself to eat spicy food just so I could finish this non-fiction novel on the involvement of the United States Coast Guard in World War Two. There were times when I would finish one whole chapter only to find my butt feeling very dry and flaky. Of course squeezing your butt-cheek or clenching the muscles of your sphincter would help remove the flakes and make washing of the bum much easier.
Nothing beats a clean toilet bowl. My favourites would include less-visited R&R or lay-bys along the North-South highway. I would however avoid the ones at the Tapah R&R because the toilets there are worse than popular prostitutes who hardly have the time to dry their pubic region because of high demand. But you cannot win them all: dumping crap is an activity that cannot be stopped by anyone, even if the King himself has summoned you. If you have to go, you have to go. Recently I was at this famous shopping mall in the Klang valley and after a bout of spicy indian food, found myself running to the gents. This was the emergency type where a simple fart in the pants would be extremely disastrous. Unfortunately, all but one toilet bowl was free, and it had to be the one with a broken seat and rim. Let me tell you, I managed to dump my crap and how I did it deserves me a phD.
So, what is your favourite activity while sitting on YOUR throne?
SeaDemon Says 