Posts

Posted on

This Is It

Michael Jackson's This Is It

It’s almost half a year since MJ’s passing, and it seems as if the world has finally accepted the fact that MJ’s gone and will never come back again. I sometimes wonder if people actually miss him. And after almost 3 weeks of hitting the big screens, This Is It was what I went to watch with Wifey.

I have written on this blog before that I am not truly a MJ fan; I listen to only a selected few songs of his, and I acknowledge him as probably being one of the best entertainers (if not THE best) that have ever lived.

However, This Is It allowed me to see MJ the person, the man behind the myth, what was he really like when he was being himself doing what he liked most. And it was sobering to see a man so filled with love and compassion, a child who never grew up but was filled with excitement, and a friend who cared for all.

All that imperfection shown on the screen, did not show MJ at his best. But it also showed what it took to be the best, and the best MJ was, and will always be.

It is the first movie that I did not see anyone standing when the ending credits began to roll. Everyone waited until it was truly over. And when it was, they clapped.

And I guess, they do miss MJ, and will continue to miss MJ.

Posted on

3 Years In Penang

If my memory serves me right, the first time I ever went to Penang was when I followed my parents on their first tour of the north after my father took the helm of the Royal Malaysian Police Force after his predecessor was assassinated by communist terrorists (whose leader some quarters in this country are trying to bring back and portray as a Patriot). That was in 1974. And we stayed at what was the Merlin Hotel on Farquhar Street (now the City Bayview Hotel on Jalan Farquhar). My parents left early for some reason, so I had to stay at the house of someone who became my batchmate at the Malay College 5 years later (Dr Suhaimi Osman, now a cardiologist at the National Heart Institute) until we left Penang some days later, by virtue that I had to follow the late Datuk Ahmad Maulana SM Babjee (former head of CID, and also an uncle of Dr Suhaimi).

After that I never visited Penang again until 1980, when I followed my family on holiday there. Then, again in 1981 and 1982, when Dato Zaman Khan was the CPO of Penang, 1983 when I was a Cadet Sergeant, taking the Company out on an excursion. My next visit after that was in 1986 after my return from England (I went on an ad-hoc camping trip with my schoolmate, Hafiz a.k.a Jawa).

In 1989, I was stationed at the RMAF Air Training Command HQ, located at the former RAAF School, Jalan Azyze, Tanjung Bungah (Hillside), initially as the Staff Officer (3) Programming, then as the HQ Adjutant a year later until I left in early 1992.

I would say Penang was one of the best places I was ever stationed at when I was still serving. A typical day would have been like this:

0700 – breakfast at the Officers’ Mess
0745 – morning parade
0800 – work commences
1245 – lunch at the Officers’ Mess
1400 – work re-commence
1600 – ‘O’ Group to plan activities for the evening
1615 – work ends: back to the Officers’ Mess to change
1700 – off to Teluk Bahang or at the breakwater of what is now the Copthorne Orchid for fishing
2359 – back at the Officers’ Mess

My fishing kakis included Corporal Hashim (later Warrant Officer Hashim who was with me at the Air Force Legal Department, now retired and living in Sentul), Corporal Karim (who was with me later at Songhkla, now retired as a Warrant Officer and is now living in Pengkalan Hulu), Corporal Budin (passed away in 1993), Warrant Officer Rahman Said (passed away in 1995, he retired at the age of 42 in 1992 and got married the following year), Sivalingam (our civilian clerk who has now retired and residing in Taiping), Sergeant Aziz Din (the guy who coined the famous term Thursday night Friday, now retired and living in Kodiang), Corporal Lim Boon Cheng (passed away in 1994), army Captain Ustaz Razali (KAGAT) who got transferred out in 1990 (I used to make him watch porn movies as part of his mess initiation), Flight Sergeant Zakaria Din (retired as a Warrant Officer, now living in Bangi), Flight Sergeant Misran Sueib (retired in 1995 and went back to Trong, Perak), Corporal Ustaz Shahrul (from KAGAT) and Aircraftman Nizam (the Kelantanese Iban who reported for duty to me saying, “Saya orang IBAE tuae!”).

We were like so into fishing that even our General Officer Commanding (GOC or Panglima), Brigadier General Dato’ Fauzi bin Hussain (retired as a Major General, as Deputy Chief of Air Force) used to join us fishing during weekends.

General Fauzi was my Panglima when I joined the Air Force as an Officer Cadet. He remained the Command HQ’s Panglima until he was succeeded in 1990 by Brigadier General Dato’ Nawi Alias (retired as a Major General, he was also the Inspector-General of the Air Force, and also the Chief of Staff, Malaysian Armed Forces), followed by Brigadier General Abdullah Omar (retired as the GOC 1st Air Division).

We had two Chief of Staffs when I was there: first it was Lieutenant Colonel Chong Keng Lay, an Air Force hero, a disciplinarian but cared for his subordinates, until 1990 (he was posted to RMAF Station Kuala Lumpur a.k.a known as TUDM Sungai Besi), followed by Colonel Nagaratnam Ampalam, a quiet but stern disciplinarian, who jogs 10km every evening without fail. Definitely not an apple polisher as he never played golf to please superiors. He earned the nickname Mango Dragon from us (Mango because of the Tamil word for Mango is Maam Palam, that’s where the word Mempelam originated from, and Dragon from his name Naga).

The building itself used to be the Royal Australian Air Force school, for children of the members of the RAAF stationed at the Butterworth AFB (they now have Dalat School along Jalan Tanjung Bungah). It was opened on 9th May 1962, and the last school year was in 1988, before it was taken over by the Royal Malaysian Air Force.

The Air Training Command (Markas Pemerintahan Pendidikan Udara) ceased to exist in 1993, and the premise was taken over by the Institut Latihan Ikhtisas TUDM (ILIT), and was later renamed Sekolah Ikhtisas Tentera Udara (SITU).

Sometimes, after office, we would go to Murad‘s along Jalan Tanjong Tokong (it was seafront then before they reclaimed the seafront) to eat Cucur Bawang with Teh Tarik, or Mee Hoon Soup Utara; and at night we would have Char Kuey Teow at Tanjung Bungah itself.

The area was initially a gangsters’ hideout, and gangsters were notoriously killing people and dumping the bodies at the ravine along Jalan Lembah Permai, and the chinese cemetery located at Mount Erskine (we nicknamed this place Mount Foreskin). These two locations were linked via Fettes Park (we pronounced it as Fatties).

The area became peaceful after we were deployed there, for reasons I shall not disclose here.

Anyway, I’ve lost all the pics of my tour in Penang. I only have three albums left of my childhood and teenage days. I have no picture of me prior to the age of 13. I blame that on my divorce.

Below are pictures of our Command HQ from various sources:

Google Maps Satellite view
Google Maps satellite view of Tanjung Tokong on the right, and Tanjung Bungah on the left. Right most is the reclaimed area that was once one of my fishing areas (Courtesy of Google Maps)

When it was still the RAAF School
When it was still the RAAF School (Picture courtesy of RAAF School Penang)

This was the Air Training Command HQ a year after I left in 1992
The Air Training Command HQ in 1992, a year after I was posted out (Picture courtesy of RAAF School Penang)

The yard
The basketball yard under RAAF School – on the left was the Junior Ranks’ Barracks, now replaced by a 3-storey block, while on the right was the Cookhouse and Junior Ranks’ Mess. This block is no longer there. (Picture courtesy of RAAF School Penang)

The yard in 1988
The basketball yard after the RAAF handed over the complex to the RMAF in 1988 (Picture courtesy of RAAF School Penang)

SITU in 2003
SITU in 2003. This was the Administration Block where my office was located (Picture courtesy of RAAF School Penang)

SITU in 2007
SITU in 2007. The Administration Block is the one on the right (where my office was located). The center block housed the Logistics, Engineering and Operations Squadrons. The left-most block was the Officers’ Mess (Picture courtesy of RAAF School Penang)

Posted on

Last Kopek

Monsoon diving would normally remind me of this particular trip:

A normally 1-hour trip on the speedboat to Tioman took 3.5 hours

This was when the speedboats were still plying the Mersing-Tioman route three years ago. On this particular day, a journey that would normally take an hour, became a three and a half hour-journey.

Recently, Wifey and I, together with Hana, Fazira and Ali, went to Tioman with Renek and Dalie, and their whole family. It was a good trip as it would be Hana’s last trip before her SPM exams. I enjoyed that trip. It was also the first time Wifey and Hana dived together. It was also the first trip Wifey did a night dive.

Wifey and Hana at Soyak

A week later, Wifey and I went to Tioman again. And though the weather then was predicted to be bad, it turned out to be the last of the best weekend dives there. The sun was out, the fishes were big. And we enjoyed two full days of diving.

Wifey doing a swim-through at Chebeh

As for next year’s dive plans, I can’t really plan much. Come January 1st, my colleague, Azli, and I, will be transferred on promotion to our drilling joint-venture company. Although my boss shall remain the same, my colleagues will consist of mainly Mat Sallehs…totally different work culture. But at least, I no longer have to work on alternate Saturdays. But I will still be required to go offshore from time to time for inspections and audits. At least, I can start making impromptu dive trips again.

Having said the above, we will be returning to Tioman in February, and then Perhentian and Tioman in March, before the annual 5D/4N pilgrimage to Sipadan in April.

I know, it’s only November; but I can’t wait to immerse myself in sea water again.

Posted on

Bodoh

Lepas cerita bomoh, kita cerita bodoh.

Zaman-zaman gawat ni, ada yang kena VSS, ada yang projek tak jalan, ada yang business kecundang, dan sebagainya. Bulan January ni pun ada salah sebuah syarikat minyak terkemuka yang akan exercise VSS untuk lebih kurang 600 orang staffnya nationwide. So, ada bini yang jadi full-time housewife, dan sometimes suami pun. Either way, the one remaining breadwinner kena kerja kuat untuk nak menyara isteri/suami dan anak-anak.

Cerita pasal duit, aku ingat dulu aku terima seorang Corporal yang amat problematic. Terima here means ditukarkan dari unit lain ke unit aku tanpa aku rela menerima kehadirannya. Kuat berjudi. Satu hari tu dia datang mengadap aku (dulu orang tak berani mengadap aku selagi aku tak panggil sebab to come see me was deemed as a suicidal act). Tapi mamat ni berani.

Dia mintak pinjam RM200 dari Tabung Squadron sebab tak cukup duit nak beli lauk dan susu anak. Aku pun panggil aku punya Squadron Sergeant-Major mintak vouch for this guy before aku approve. So, the latter told me that it’s the truth, dia sendiri pergi check Corporal ni punya quarters. So, aku pun approve. Memang mamat ni punya bini pun selalu ambik barang kedai bayar guna thumbprint aje (in other words, Buku 555).

Lepas dapat duit, aku nampak mamat ni kirim kat seorang AC (Aircraftman, atau dalam army lingo – Private. Sekarang ni Laskar Udara) suruh beli nombor ekor RM10 BIG, RM10 SMALL. Tak angin ke aku masa tu? Pecah habis cermin kat office aku, aku kerjakan dia cukup-cukup.

Bila aku tanya bini dia kenapa dia tak file complaint kat Pejabat KAGAT (Kor Agama Angkatan Tentera), dia boleh jawab:

“Nak buat macam mana, tuan? Dah jodoh.”

Itu cerita orang kerja. Ini cerita orang tak kerja pulak.

Kalau kena berhenti kerja, especially in times of gawat, memang susah nak cari kerja balik. I know – been there done that back in 1997. Tapi yang aku tak faham, orang yang mintak berhenti kerja, lepas tu malas nak cari kerja sebab isteri dia bekerja. Nak beli rokok ke, nak minum teh tarik ke, mintak duit kat bini. Kalau bini tak kasi, dia marah. Masa lapang dia dihabiskan di kedai kopi dengan orang yang makan duit pencen, duduk kat kolam memancing, main takraw, dan menggentel telor kat atas katil, dan lain-lain aktiviti yang hanya bernas kalau dia breadwinner.

First of all, tak malu ke mintak duit bini for personal use? Kalau macam engkau bulan ni tak cukup duit nak cover expenses, and mintak kat bini suruh top-up, takpe la jugak. Ini tidak. Duduk rumah, hisap rokok, layan TV, lepas tu bini balik kerja expect bini pergi beli barang basah, masak, untuk dia makan dan menggemukkan diri.

Lelaki macam ni la yang aku tak reti nak faham. Aku tulis ni sebab kena kat batang hidung seorang kawan aku, sebab baru ni kat office dia mintak pinjam duit, lepas tu mintak advanc lagi dari HR. Rupanya laki dia yang ke hulu ke hilir cerita projek juta-juta tu…pemalas rupanya – biawak hidup.

Aku tanya dia, kenapa tak mintak orang atau family untuk nasihatkan laki dia? Dia jawab,

“Nak buat macam mana, Capt? Dah jodoh.”

Itu bukan JODOH namanya.

Itu BODOH.

Posted on

Boh Mau?

Sakit pulak pinggang aku hari ni. Sebenarnya dah 3 hari dah sakit. Dari sehari ke sehari nak pergi urut tak pernahnya nak sempat. Ada saja benda yang nak dibuat termasuklah lepas kerja. Semalam, aku dihiburkan oleh seorang makcik (definisi makcik: seorang wanita bertudung, berkain batik jawa, berumur tidak melebihi 35 tahun tetapi rupa seperti 50 tahun) yang sedang melintas jalan tanpa nak pandang kiri kanan dulu tengok jalan clear ke tidak. Lepas tu dia nampak kereta aku, terus dia melajukan langkahnya, tetapi pada masa yang sama, langkah dia bertambah pendek. Jadilah rupa dia macam Flintstone yang baru mula nak berlari – kaki kayuh laju tapi tak ke mana-mana pun.

Dan petang ni aku kentut dalam kereta jenis panas dan amat berbau, lantas aku tak berani nak kentut lagi takut dia terus ter-cret. Nasib baik ada toilet RM2 kat KLCC…berak sambil bersantai.

Cerita hari ini adalah mengenai bomoh-berbomoh. Aku tak faham macam mana orang yang kononnya kuat sembahyang, atau berpendidikan tinggi, berjawatan, masih boleh kuat berbomoh. Kalau macam ex-wives aku, memang patut la, kan? Diorang ngok skets.

Sebagai contoh: seorang isteri yang suka melawan suami, jatuhkan air muka suami, merendahkan orang lain sebab awak berpangkat…satu hari, selepas bertahun bersabar, suaminya kahwin lain. Terus si isteri nak berbomoh, nak buat suaminya bercerai dengan isteri keduanya. Dah lah berbomoh untuk membuatkan suaminya bercerai tu dosa besar, siap nak kasi diorang bercerai – itu satu lagi dosa besar. Suami kahwin lain tanpa kebenaran ke, kahwin lari ke luar negeri ke, mau tak mau itu semua sah dari segi syara’. Mintak permission ni procedural sahaja. Bukannya presecribed by the Quran pun. Dah tu, tak jumpa bomoh yang power, dia jumpa orang alim yang pandai dalam hal perubatan paranormal ni. Sekali tu, orang alim ni cakap kat dia,

“Berdosa nak ceraikan orang yang saling kasih-mengasihani. Suami awak tu dah lama tak ada perasaan terhadap awak sebab awak kuat melawan, memalukan suami di hadapan orang lain. Awak baliklah rumah dan cermin diri awak sendiri. Tengok di mana silap awak.”

Orang alim ni pompuan gak. Jadi, coming from a woman,tak la sejanggal kalau ayat di atas disebutkan oleh orang lelaki. Tup-tup, melentinglah si isteri ni kata dia tak ada salah apa-apa pun.

Susah kalau dah tua dan tak sedarkan diri ni.

Satu lagi golongan yang amat suka berbomoh ni ialah orang berpolitik. Bila nak bertanding jawatan aje, semua pakat cari bomoh, cari pelaris, cari penunduk dan sebagainya. Yang nak gelak tu, most of them go to the same bomoh but at different times. Macam mana bomoh tu nak lawan power dia sendiri? Kan, bongok namanya tu?

Satu lagi, yang bawak anak jumpa bomoh bila dekat nak SPM..nak kasi terang hati supaya score SPM dengan cemerlang. Lepas jumpa bomoh, minum air bekas ludah sembur bomoh, anak tu minum segelas dan terus pergi merempit. You think the magical powers work ke? Kalau you think it works, suruh la tuition centers semua tutup. Cikgu-cikgu pun boleh start apply untuk kerja yang sekarang ni dipenuhkan oleh mat-mat Bangla, Indon dan Myanmar.

Lepas tu, geng yang nak kawin dengan orang yang tak nak kat dia. Siap bawak gambar kat bomoh, suruh bomoh ubatkan kasi dia jatuh cinta dengan orang yang bawak gambar ni tadi. Kalau kau sanggup keluar duit nak berbomoh, buat apa nak kejar anak Pak Abu, Pak Tam dan sebagainya? Bomohkan aje anak Agong ke, anak Sultan ke…berbaloi la skets. Ni la melayu bodoh.

Pokok pangkalnya, orang melayu ni memang dicipta sebagai bangsa yang bodoh, cepat tertipu, dan nak solution semua jenis cepat. Tuhan tu cuma sebagai figurehead aje…untuk claim dia punya religious-identity; tapi to get things done, dia sanggup kawan dengan setan.

I rest my case.

Posted on

Innocently Happy

Nisaa and Farhan at my office - Friday 30th October 2009
Nisaa and Farhan at my office last week

I was waiting for my turn to buy some satay because Wifey’s cousin from Sarawak was coming over for dinner when I saw a little girl, who looked a bit like Nisaa when she was two plus, looking at her mother who was quarreling over the phone.

“Mak, mak!” she called to her mother. “Ayah ke tu?”

Her mother nodded.

“Nak cakap dengan ayah!” her eyes gleamed. Her mother passed her the phone and she happily yakked away on the phone with her father.

I remember that happy face on Nisaa’s when I was going through a bad period with her mother.

Such innocence…

Posted on

Why Arrest Dr Md Asri?

Recently, enforcement officers from JAIS (some 35 of them) raided a bungalow in Hulu Kelang and arrested Dr Md Asri Zainal Abidin, the former Mufti of Perlis, for teaching religion without a commission from the department.

Dr Asri (or MAZA as he is more popularly known as), has long been a thorn in the sides of the other muftis for his more liberal views compared to the rest. He is so liberal that he has been labeled as a ‘Wahabbi’. The difference between Wahabbi and Sunnis are simple. Wahabbis reject what they term as bid’ah (where the malay word bedaah originated) – and bid’ah include the reading of Surah Yaasiin especially on Thursday nights, or even have a Surah Yaasiin booklet, or having the Imam to recite the do’a on behalf of the congregation, zikir after prayers etc etc.

I, for one, do not believe in sects (mazhab) as they are just schools of thoughts. One imam’s thoughts may differ to another imam’s thoughts, but if you subscribe to those thoughts, you should remember that they are not Gods that everything they say are cast in stone. Imam Shafie (whose sect Malaysians follow) say that a person’s ablution is null and void should his/her skin comes into contact with that of a person whom he/she can marry. Other imams say it will only be null and void should you feel sexually aroused when in contact.

Malaysians will then argue that among the sunnis, Shafie’s is the best. If so, why do one have to adopt the ways of other sects when going to Mecca to perform the Haj or Umrah? Why adopt an inferior way if Shafie’s is superior?

So whose Islam is right?

Now, moving towards the Sunni and Shiah (Shiite) rivalry, the Shiites claim that the Sunnis are the ones whom have digressed from the teachings of Islam. When I asked how so (to a Shiite friend), he asked me back:

“Why did the sunnis (Muawiyah) wage war against Saidina Ali, who was Muhammad’s trusted companion, and killed Muhammad’s grandchildren just because Ali deposed Muawiyah from the governorship of Syria?”

Can anyone answer this? I seriously do not know why Muawiyah, son of Abu Sufyan, the man who waged war countless of times against Muhammad, waged war against Ali, and then declared Ali’s followers as infidels?

So whose Islam is right?

That is why, I do not follow a specific mazhab. My guide is the al-Quran and aHadith an-Nabi, and whether I perform my daily prayers or not, is not anyone’s business. It is between God and I…unless you think you’re God and can pass judgment against, or label others.

Going back to Dr MAZA and Wahabbism: if they are wrong, why do we look up to Saudi Arabia as the Custodian of the two Holy Mosques? Gang-up and wage war against them, and regain control of the two mosques!

So, I ask you again, whose Islam is right in the eyes of God?

Now for JAIS, if MAZA was wrong to give a lecture without the department’s commission, tell me what was Dr Xavier Jeyakumar, the Selangor state assemblyman for Sri Andalas was doing giving lecture in a mosque? Did he have the department’s commission? Did he have the department’s permission? If not, why was he not arrested or has yet to be arrested?

Xavier Jayakumar in a mosque

Xavier Jayakumar once criticised the Sekolah Kebangsaan because he deemed it too Islamic

Sahibus Sahamah Xavier Jayakumar

This is Selangor today - prostituting the mosque

Images are from My KMU Dot Net

Posted on

All Stressed Out

NEBOSH IGC notes

Remember how I lost sleep for some 2 weeks about 3 months ago?

The results are out. I have yet to receive mine, but a coursemate’s already failed 2 papers and passed 1.

Aarrgh! I am so stressed out!

Posted on

Mothers-Out-Law

The late Bob Monkhouse, who was a British comedian, once made this funny joke about his mother-in-law:

My wife said: ‘Can my mother come down for the weekend?‘ So I said: ‘Why?‘ and she said: ‘Well, she’s been up on the roof two weeks already‘.

While I can remember my all my ex-fathers-in-law’s name, I have trouble remembering my ex-mothers-in-law’s, save for my first ex’s. They were all nice ladies, all good mothers-in-law.

My first mother-in-law was Ishah binti Puteh, who would be 70 now. She is illiterate, and uneducated, but had a heart of gold. My ex-father-in-law, started an affair with a neighbour on my wedding day, and left her a month later. She had high-respect for me and treated me very well. Whenever I go back to my ex’s hometown, she would prepare my favourite: pucuk Janggus (or Jagus, depending on whichever state you’re from) and sambal belacan. She would scold my ex for being such a lazy person, and for not even attempting to prepare meals for me, not that I ever asked my ex to do so. So, when my ex left me, taking the kids away, and subsequently filed for divorce, it was my ex-mother-in-law who tried to talk her out of it, advising her to be a better wife etc, and pleaded with me not to grant the divorce the eve of the divorce proceedings. It was heartbreaking to lose such a kind mother-in-law.

When I remarried almost 2 years later to someone I didn’t like, I of course gained another mother-in-law. A widow, she should be in her mid-70s now. By this time, I never bothered to find out what her name was, because my second ex didn’t quite like going back to her hometown unless if some special food’s been prepared by a grandaunt whom has since passed on. This ex mother-in-law of mine, was another kind-hearted woman. She would address me in the way the old Johor folks would, by adding the title ‘Encik’ before my name every time she spoke to me. Before I did my first BASE jump, she would hold prayer sessions to pray for my safety, and even made me Laksa Johor and Bariyani Gam before I went off to Mecca to perform my Haj.

My third marriage had its own complexities. However, again, I gained a thoughtful mother-in-law. Once I was working late on the eve of Aidil Fitri, and was with high-fever, she refused to let anyone, siblings, grandchildren, nephews and nieces included, to eat my favourite Hari Raya dishes – rendang paru, hati and limpa. All of them had to wait for my arrival, but alas, I was too feverish to eat anything that night. Therefore, all of them had to wait until after the Aidil Fitri prayers. When my ex blatantly disappeared with other men, coming home in the early hours of the morning, leaving a couple of hours later, my mother-in-law oozed apologies for her daughter’s behaviour. I was made to understand that she no longer makes rendang paru, limpa and hati; and every time I call her house to speak to my children when they are there, she would cry listening to my voice, still apologising for her daughter’s behaviour, and asking me not to forget her. And I feel bad, not knowing her name, except for the nickname her siblings call her: “Kak Nah.”

Such is life – I had very good mothers-in-law, but not so good wives.